Author: Allison Bramlett

It’s usually at this time of year, that there’s an influx of New Year resolutions, captions, post, blogs, new me’s, new this and new that happening. During all the new stuff, I am so thankful to know that Jesus is the same yesterday, today and forever. I am also reminded that I want to be more like Him and less like me.

It is at the start of this New Year that I begin to lay new foundations for the future. This year, I have not really made big, new resolutions, but I have decided to be faithful in my small ones. The mortar that holds my bricks together is daily prayer and Bible reading. A genuine time of intimacy with the Lord. This commitment to Christ is the foundation for successful relationships in my life. It has certainly been true for my parents, Pastors Gregory & Jackie Pope, over the last 50 years. I learned from them how to spend time talking with Daddy God.

Personally, that daily conversation with Him, helps me to have an unswerving love. This time of intimacy with the Lord has cemented promises in my heart that He has for me. Yes, I love prayer with my spouse, friends, and church family, but there is something about some one-on-one with my First Love that will forever change me. My quiet time with Him creates a connection and accountability that stabilizes my mind, will and emotions.

This time with the Lord adjusts my vision and my attitude. This means I get to choose my attitude. See attitudes have flavors: sweet, sour, bitter, even hot. It is not my spouse’s choice, my children’s choice, my coworker’s choice- it is my choice to choose the flavor. I personally know that I want to have a fruity flavor- a Galatians 5 attitude. This means that I don’t react to the wind of emotions, but instead I trust in the Truth of the Word. Philippians 2:5, “You must have the same attitude that Christ had.”

Stay vulnerable. Vulnerability is having the courage to be truthful about your flaws. And maturity is choosing to grow and strive to be the best version of you. During this prayer and word time you will realize that God loves you so much. He sees your strengths and weaknesses and still loves you. He also loves us too much to leave us the way we are. I said yes many years ago to this lifelong journey of walking, talking and following Him. Becoming the best version of me, becoming more like Him, Jesus.

This Saturday we celebrate my parents 50 year anniversary! 50 years of love! 50 years of serving! But as great as I do think they both are, I know it takes lots of “bearing with one another in love” to make it to a 50th anniversary. If the world took that commandment more seriously, many, many more marriages would go the distance.

As I sat down to write this quick blog I began to reminisce. I cherish the love stories of them and my grandparents. They make me smile big and still feel giddy. I think about how they grew up together and were always friends and partners . This makes their two lives joined as one that much more beautiful! And what a gift from Daddy God that I witnessed their love and marriage first hand! Their love for the Lord and each other taught me how to fight for my family and not with my family! It taught me endurance. It taught me compassion. It taught me how to forgive. It taught me how to hope. It taught me faith. It taught me Agape Love!

They taught me that relationships are investments. It is a choice to stay connected to each other. That if it doesn’t matter 100 years from now don’t let it matter today. (You should read their devotional Love Works Always- it is awesome- and full of life nuggets)

Their devotion to Father God and each other exemplifies the 1 Corinthians 13 kind of love! They have always honored and served Jesus, each other and all those around them with amazing humility and strength. They live out the Ephesians 4:29-32 directives. They show us that Love is an action word.

Their love is tangible. Their presence brings comfort and security. It also brings great joy and faith too! And their prayers- well I can just say that I am so thankful for them.

For over 40 years I have not only heard them but I have seen them live out love! They let the Word of God be the final authority! They aren’t moved by fickle feelings. They are Spirit led and Word fed! Their lives are a light house of God’s love! And the best is yet to come.

We do celebrate their beautiful love story on December 19th (actual anniversary date) but everyday God’s love through them touches and changes lives! I am saying to them- “Thank you for saying yes to Jesus! Thank you for saying yes to each other- over and over again”!

They know that “Love Works Always”!

Amazing relationships that are very healthy do not react or make decisions based on emotions. Emotions are unpredictable. Even though emotions are real, they can be very deceptive and wrong. Yes, we are emotional beings but we should not be controlled by our emotions.

After many years of riding an emotional roller coaster- we set up keys that helped stop the cycle. We made a decision to let the Word of God dictate our life and not our emotions.

Here are some facts- Did you know 86% of divorces are the result of what researchers call “non-severe circumstances”? These are circumstances like money, kids, sex, emotional issues, and a breakdown in communication. That means the relationship-ending circumstances were not related to problems like abuse, abandonment or adultery. I call the three A’s. Most relationships are lost over emotional choices. Things that happen in the heat of the moment.

We decided that the D word (divorce) was not allowed in our home to threaten each other. It could not be used as a tool to manipulate and control the other person. It cannot be part of your language.

We began investing in each other and not threatening each other. And when we could not find a compromise or solution we would seek Godly counsel. We learned to get help. This is one of the wisest decisions we ever made and we still get help when we need it!

We made a choice to seek the Lord together through prayer, Bible study, worship, iron friends, and fasting.

We celebrate each other. Learning to cheer for each other instead of criticizing. This makes for a much better partnership.

We learned to have heart to heart conversations instead of hurt to hurt.

Even during times of frustration or difficulty, never let your heart be turned away from each other.

We chose friends that would encourage us to do the right thing, even during hard times. We stayed connected to our faith family, church.

Remember apart from your relationship with God, your marriage is the most important relationship in your life. The shocking truth is your marriage is more important than your children, your job, your personal interests or your hobbies. Choose to invest in meeting each other’s needs, and refuse to sacrifice your marriage for emotions.

You have to base it on God’s Love- 1 Corinthians 13! His Love never fails! We will base our marriage on Christ-like love. Your marriage should be sacrificial and permanent. Marriage is a covenant designed by God. That means your marriage is based on the decision to love and cherish each other and not on feelings, convenience or comfort- “for better or worse- in sickness and health- til death do us part”! Create a covenant marriage that can weather the storms of emotions, disagreements, and difficulties. You will not regret choosing Love!

We all have pits in our lives. Pits are even worse than ruts. The problem is not the pit but staying in it. We are responsible for seeking a way out. We may find ourselves thrown into some pits- some we jump into. But regardless of how you ended up in it, don’t let the pit get in you and make you “pitiful”. You can not make the pit your home and fulfill your purpose. Don’t believe the lie that you are suppose to live in the pit. We were never created to live in dark places. John 8:12, Jesus spoke to them again, saying, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows Me shall not walk in darkness, but shall have the light of life.”

We have all experienced the consequences of our choices both, good and bad. The Good News is Daddy God can work ALL things to your good. In Matthew 5 Jesus says, “you are the light of the world.” We don’t have the ability to solve our own problems, but Daddy God can, will and already has!

It is important to acknowledge the pit you may be facing, but always remember there is a bigger promise that will get you out and over.

I have even more great news! God makes choices too, and forgiveness is his favorite one! He forgives so quickly and so often that the Word says it’s His habit.

“If you, GOD, kept records on wrongdoings, who would stand a chance? As it turns out, forgiveness is your habit, and that’s why you’re worshiped.” Psalms 130:3-4

Surround yourself today with faith friends- those people that have come through for you, stood with you, forgiven you, cheered for you, supported you, seen the real you , and helped pull you out of your pits. Remember change is possible and it is a choice!

Let me tell you today that you are an influencer and culture changer, and it starts with changing your story. Don’t let shame write your story! Don’t let pit stops paralyze you on your way to the palace. Let me encourage you to read the story of Joseph, and take note of his attitude, how it adjusts in light of God’s promise. (Genesis 37-50 story of Joseph) Remember don’t get comfortable in the pit. Remember you are not alone- Ask Holy Spirit for wisdom to get out. Make a move!

For me, Forgiveness is the real F word. When I was a little girl, one Bible story that stuck with me is about Peter asking Jesus how many times he should forgive someone who has sinned against him. Jesus first replies with what would seem to be an absurd number of times — “seventy times seven” — and then He follows with a parable about forgiveness. Matthew 18:21-35.

I now know that forgiveness is a supernatural thing that is possible with the help of Holy Spirit. I have loved Jesus all my life, and Jeff for most of it. I was fourteen years old when I met him and knew that he would be my husband. He didn’t know yet. This was the beginning of an amazing God adventure that we are still sharing today. Two of the secrets making our journey possible is through God’s unconditional love and His gift of forgiveness. 

Here is the hard thing, we think, “what if someone does something that is unforgivable?” In the scripture above, it doesn’t list forgivable and unforgivable things. It just says Forgive. This is not a suggestion, it’s a command. The great thing is Daddy God never asks us to do anything that He has not equipped us to do. This scripture also says that we get to forgive over and over again. There is no caveat that says to forgive someone if they deserve it or even ask for it. Forgiveness is serious business.

My husband and I have lived through one of those experiences that gives us an opportunity to share our forgiveness story. For many years my husband struggled with sex addiction, and I struggled with forgiveness. Now, forgiveness doesn’t mean forgetting, and it also doesn’t mean agreeing, but it does mean freedom. In the above scripture, it says to forgive over and over and over again. Until this happened in our marriage, I am not sure that I understood this command. As my mind would run wild, I would have to take those thoughts captive, apply the blood of Jesus, and filter them through God’s Word so that I could forgive. Every time you remember something and it causes an emotional reaction, you have to reapply forgiveness. Forgiveness has become my immediate response. I forgive before something needs to be forgiven, but I also “trust the Lord with all my heart and lean not on my own understanding and in all my ways acknowledge Him.” Once I realized that God never meant for me to trust people, it helped take the pressure off. I am supposed to trust Him with all my heart and love people. Now, while writing this it sounds easy, but it was hard getting the “hell” out of my head and the Word in my mouth. I chose to be intentional with my thoughts and my words. I realized Daddy God has forgiven me more times than I will ever have the opportunity to forgive Jeff, or anyone else. 

I remember thinking, “Lord how do you forgive and then forget?” He reminded me that I am to be like Jesus. I wondered, “Does Jesus remember hell?” Yes, I believe that He does, and even has the scars to prove it. Yet, His love for me made it worth it to Him. My love for God and others made my hell and the scars worth it. When I look at our scars, I see a future and not a past. Many years ago, Holy Spirit woke me up and showed me myself on a stage sharing with others how to fight for their family and not with their family. Forgiveness is part of the good fight of faith. 

Here is another scripture that stays with me, “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you” Ephesians 4:32. All these forgiveness verses became so clear to me. I was equipped with the power of God to forgive. “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you” Colossians 3:12-13. 

Forgiveness is not for the other person as much as it is for you to be free. I must receive personal forgiveness from Daddy God so that I can set another free of their failures. I believe that most of the ground the enemy gains in a believer’s life is because of unforgiveness. We were created for relationships and this is the only place forgiveness is really needed. People we love are going to hurt us, and we are going to hurt them. The question is how will we respond when we get hurt? I have already made my mind up that I am going to forgive. It is amazing to me that whatever we’ve done, and whatever our motivation was, God forgives us. And He wants and expects us to do the same.

This need for forgiveness and the lie of shame started long ago in a Garden. Adam and Eve were unashamed until sin entered their lives and intimacy was broken. This is what unforgiveness does in our lives. It breaks intimacy with Daddy God and others. For Jeff and I, we had to let the past hurts and offenses go so that we could gain the ability to love each other as we should. We have to deal with this issue of forgiveness to have real intimacy. Forgiveness is a purifying agent for our lives and relationships. We chose not to play the shame and blame game.

Let Go! I want to encourage you today to let go of the mirror you’ve been using to look behind you. Unforgiveness causes us to live in our past rather than in our present and prevents us from moving into a better future. You have to turn off the replay in your mind and let it all go. 

Choose Love! Forgiveness is a choice. Choose to love the person that has offended and hurt you. Then let your behavior and mouth reflect that choice. (It won’t be easy.) This doesn’t mean you have to have a relationship with them, but you have released forgiveness to them. Decide not to dwell on the past. 

Bless Them Out! My Dad has always told me you will never meet anyone Daddy God doesn’t want to bless. Yes, even those that have hurt you. Remember, hurting people will hurt people. In Luke 6:28, Jesus shows us how to bless out those who mistreat us. This is a powerful weapon in changing wrong thoughts and negative feelings. Prayer transforms hurt into hope and criticisms into compassion. Let me also say, if you refuse to pray for someone it shows that your are failing the forgiveness test. 

Do It Again! Do not bring hurt into your future. Settle in your mind and heart now that you will always forgive. 

Successful relationships are possible if we follow God’s lead in love and forgiveness. When you apply these it will change the atmosphere. I believe in being a thermostat and not a thermometer. Thermostats set the atmosphere and thermometers just read atmospheres. You are an atmosphere changer with God’s love. 

I am able to love my husband today because of this miraculous power of forgiveness, which is only available with help from Holy Spirit. We have been married for over twenty-five years and have two beautiful children, two amazing “in loves” (a son in law and a daughter in law), and two grandchildren, with a third on the way. I am so thankful that we chose God’s way instead of ours.  We chose to not let past, pain, pride, pettiness or people stop us from our God purpose. I am praying that you will choose love and forgiveness today. Let me know your story- It matters. Here is a simple prayer that I use and wanted to share. But when I was in the thick of it, I want you to know that sometimes all I could do is whisper the name of Jesus and that was enough.

Heavenly Father, thank you for loving and forgiving me. Thank you for bringing me into a relationship with you through your Son, Jesus, and for showing me love and forgiveness in action. Help me! Holy Spirit, show me how to share the same forgiveness with others that you have shown me. Put your super on my natural.  Let others see You living in me. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.

I am so thankful for all that has happened in the last few months. Forgive me for my lack of blogging. I am so thankful that the Lord knows our beginning and end and also helps us in the messy middle. My family has grown so much over the last 2 years. I have gained the most wonderful son in love and daughter in love. I have a grandson, Robert, that we are crazy in love with too. I have learned that life is a highway and the only way to travel is in a vehicle called faith on a road called hope fueled by love. Use your gps- God’s positioning system! You have to choose to not drive looking back- jerk the rear view mirror off.

I look at how fast time has gone by and Father God has been so kind to me. I am looking toward the future full of excitement, filled with hope, with a download of faith, and more love than ever before. Remember today whatever area of your life there is a problem it is because there is great purpose. So if there is an attack on your family, job, marriage, children, finances, church, etc…. know that there is a great purpose. Get a prayer partner- shouting partner- because the enemy wants you wear you out so you will give up but through prayer you can catch your breath, get heaven’s vision, stand in faith, speak truth in love, and take back what the enemy has stolen. Romans 8:28 is true for you and me. So thankful for my shouting partners that have held my arms up in times where I felt weary and helped me press on to my purpose- surround yourself with people that are compassionate and not critical- that talk your purpose and not your problem- that always points toward Jesus. I am expecting joyful adventures, beautiful moments, awesome opportunities, unmerited favor, amazing people, double anointing, and growth in God things. To be led by Holy Spirit, peace to be my compass, compassion be my glasses, and to walk in my purpose- and do not let pain, past, people, pettiness, and pride stop us from our God Adventure! I am excited to see what all the Lord has planned!

“So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever.” (2 Corinthians 4:18 NLT)

It is a choice every single day to either rely on the naked eye or to trust the Father God and believe what we really can’t see. A life of faith. Hebrews 11:1 says, “Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” Issues, situations, trials, and tribulations will throw water in your face and make you wake up to the unseen, Faith. They are all crossroads of Faith. One of the first spiritual principles I ever learned was to not look at life through my naked eyes but to look through my spiritual eyes. The unseen things, the spiritual things, eternal things: wearing your faith glasses that always work through love. Galatians 5:6 says, “… the only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love.” When we realize that the God of the universe created us for His good pleasure and that we were made in His image and given His Spirit; we realize we also have His vision.

We must first use this vision to see ourselves. We are children of the King. Royalty! We are ambassadors. Authority! You have unlimited potential and power. When you start looking at yourself through the mirror of the Word and realize that you are madly loved; it is a game changer. This allows you to let the Father God take your trash and make it a treasure. Father God is always better at saving than we are at sinning. He has you covered. We can’t earn it and we will never deserve it, but it is our gift of love that is given freely. You are destined for greatness so don’t let pain, past, present, people, and pride stop you from your God purpose. Put on your spiritual glasses of faith and see what the Father sees in you and others.

Knowing God’s purpose is more about a relationship than a job title, it is a life long journey of a beautiful love story. God focuses more on who you are becoming rather than all you are doing. Living by Faith is the game changing decision that you have to make. You have to always choose the Father’s side; the side of love and faith.

Our words that we speak and the conversations we have are powerful. A loving word from Father God can heal your past, secure your present, and give hope for your future. There is life and death in the power of the tongue. Recently in my quiet time the Holy Spirit started dealing with my on what are we really saying in conversations with ourself and others. I began to take an inventory of my thoughts and words. I knew immediately that it was time for a shift even in what conversations I listened to.  I was being dealt with on three C’s: Criticism, control, and comparison. Realizing that if I was being critical or a part of critical conversation then I was not being moved by compassion. Letting myself see the treasure in others and not the trash. We are called to be treasure hunters and not trash inspectors. (that line is something my daughter says often) I knew if I was dealing with control then there was no room for comfort. It was a form of manipulation and something that normally can’t be satisfied. The Word of God tells us to have self-control and we know that the Father God nor the devil makes us do anything that we don’t want to do. Then there was that word comparison. One that most women deal with. It starts from the first mirror glance every morning. We compare ourselves to the memory of our youth, to our family, friends, magazines and the list goes on- yet we are made in the image of God and when we begin to compare anything we lose our contentment and thankfulness. I would ask you today to think about the words that you speak. When someone walks away from a conversation with you do they leave criticized, controlled, and compared; or when someone walks away from a conversation with you do they leave feeling compassion, comfort, and contentment? Normally the people we are closest to we need to watch our conversations with. Let us not take each other for granted and let us be a 1 Corinthians 13 kinda of Love to others. Let us choose to be love in action.

my love! makes me smile

my girl

my guy in me in NYC

my babies and their loves!